For the love of Christ constraineth us...

God taught me the meaning of that today. I'll be honest: I hate to see where our christian youth is going. We are sliding downhill very rapidly. It is almost nauseating to see how pitiful christianity is now. As I spent time grumbling and growling about how stupid this situation is and why are these people doing this when they know better and this and that thing God spoke this word to me, "The love of Christ constraineth us." It doesn't matter what they do. All I know is that the only person I want to serve is Jesus Christ. Why? because I love him. My love to him is why, by his grace, I want to make him smile. 

Some extra Juarez Stuff

Here are some more photos that I put on facebook. Even if you do not have an account you can go look at these. I captioned them in sort of a slideshow type manner. Enjoy!
http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.2039052864345.127476.1484993779&l=002fb78e05
Do have patience with facebook as their photo galleries can have issues sometimes.

Mexico

I have been looking back and reflecting on my trip and I keep remembering little details here and there. Overall the trip was VERY good. There were a few problems along the way but God really blessed.

     I heard about this trip from a newsletter in my E-mail that I get from Chick Publications. It was perfect timing that I got it too. God had been, and still is, doing something in my life that changed the way I have been thinking. A few situations and having already had a burden for Mexico, I got this E-mail. It was definitely God's timing. I talked with many of my peers in church to try to get them in on it and Matt decided to join in. We got our tickets and our motel reservations (which we ended up not needing but I'll go on about that later) and got ready.

     Matt and I left the Saturday before the whole thing started. We figured that we'd check out the church and See the city a bit. We flew out of the Boise airport without a problem. Our flight was on time and we had everything, it was exciting. We then arrived in Denver where the first problem arrived. We knew that we'd have to be quick to get to our flight since we only had about 1/2 an hour to get to our gate. It was pretty good timing that we got there but we came to find out that our flight was cancelled to El Paso. They got us another plane and an extra 45 minutes. Matt and I decided to explore the Denver Airport (which was pretty neat) and then we had to get back to our gate. Beltway after beltway we finally got back to the other side of the airport with just enough time to get a Starbucks. Sipping on our frappuccinos we found out that we had a plane but no crew to fly it meaning more waiting. We finally got a crew and then boarded the heavily cramped airplane. As it taxied we were informed that, somehow, the plane had been over fueled and we'd have to wait on the tarmac for about 45 minutes as they burned off fuel. A tired sigh of relief overcame all those aboard the plane as the pilot(ess{which I thought was strange}) informed us that we would be taking off. It was a smooth and uneventful flight... thankfully.

     In El Paso we disembarked from the plane to find an eerily empty airport. We then commenced to find our motel information. "Our motel should be pretty close to the airport." Matt had been telling me. "Let's call them and ask if they have a shuttle" he then said. So I called our motel and found out that they were kind of lost as to why we would ask such an absurd question. I called my dad and asked for him to find the information on his computer because everything we were finding in the airport said that we were nowhere near our motel. It turns out that I had made reservations for a motel about 15 minutes away. We ended up taking a taxi to our motel and getting some supper before going to bed wearied and a little frustrated. I had been talking to Matt and I was mad that I had made such a stupid mistake but he reminded me that there's a reason for everything. There was a soul driving that taxi by the name of Angel who was able to receive a tract and CD. Pray for him, perhaps salvation is near for him.

     Sunday arrived and we had contacted Hector Jimenez, the man who basically was the one whom God used to have the vision for this outreach. He is a very humble man. He does a lot with BPS El Paso mostly driving buses and doing whatever is needed. He came and picked us up and took us to the BPS facility where we unloaded our stuff and discovered our home for the next week. It was a nice facility with a couple dorms, many rooms similar to motel rooms, a nice kitchen, lots of storage rooms, and a game room assembly area. In another building not far away there was a bus garage where they kept two or three 1960's greyhound buses that were very nice for this sort of thing. One of them was the bus that took us many times into Mexico and back. They also had a print shop affixed to the building where they mostly collate and bind covers to John and Romans and New Testaments.

                                                          Hector Jimenez driving our bus
     We had just enough time to get a bunk and see a little of the place before it was time to roll out to church. After church we went back to the facility and met some of the men. Then, after lunch some ping-pong and Foosball it was time to get ready to go to night church. This was our first trip to Mexico of the trip. We were going to go to church at Iglesia Bautista Agua Viva where a man from our group spoke after we sang many familiar songs but in Spanish. I loved singing those songs in Spanish and listening to the people sing.

                                                              (Living Water Baptist Church)  
                                                                    Pastor Joe Compana
     Monday morning rolled around and after an impressive breakfast, which is something that they served every day, the men geared up. It was an odd day for me because I didn't really know anybody. I felt a little apprehensive because I wasn't sure just how unusual these 40 or so men were going to be. That day I had the opportunity to meet the director or Bearing Precious Seed, Al Braley and a Pastor From New Mexico. We got to talk a lot and pray together. God really used that first day to help me and get me into the frame of mind that I needed and to meet everybody.

     After lunch (The ladies made Mexican food most of the week and it was all very good) we went back out to pass out many more John/Romans. Most of the time we would be placed at a busy intersection and when the cars would stop we would walk along the line handing them to people through their windows until the light turned green, or I should say until we were able to get out of the road and the possibility getting hit then we'd do it again when the light went back to red. This was pretty much what we did all week. Sometimes we were at lights, sometimes at stop signs and sometimes at yield signs but we were able to give many out to drivers. Sometimes some of the Spanish speakers would get on a bus like the ones driving all over town and preach for about 5 minutes while going one way and then he'd do the same coming back.

One of the intersections I worked

                                                  One of hundreds of buses that were all over town
     Every night at 7 we'd meet up in a different area where they set up for speaking. They had special music, puppet shows and, of course, preaching. There were many people over the whole week that got saved. The meetings had a lot of people from Mexican churches and then several people who had received invitations with their John/Romans.

The meeting Monday night

The singers on Monday night

                                                                  Tuesday night singers
     I met several Mexican people over there whom I came to love as much as my closest friends. I could hardly communicate with several of them but God gave a special unity over this whole thing. I met a man named Lalo I think I first got to work with him on Tuesday and we were together most of the rest of the week. It was nice that he had spent much of his time in the U.S. so he spoke English quite well. Lalo had such a brightness to him. He had a passion for the people of Juarez. Here was a man with tattoos all up his arms and neck singing practically the whole time we we're out there and then pleading with people to read their John/Romans and come to the meeting. I also met a pastor from farther south of Juarez who was sent out by one of the churches we visited for lunches. Pastor Julian was very nice. He had a very pleasant family. I could tell the way he jumped into things with all his might that he was a hard worker. He spoke a little English and I spoke a little Spanish and we were able to communicate a little but it was a blessing. We became very good friends and he invited me to come and visit his church. I would love to have that opportunity. I even got to play soccer with him and his younger teenage son and several other Mexicans. That was a blast as well. Some others that I had a much harder time communicating with but there was just a unity and a brotherhood. It was an amazing thing to me because overall there was about seventeen churches represented and there was such a unity and the men and women had such a heart to work. Where I could only imagine how this could have worked in a lot of places in the U.S., God blessed over there. I was blessed to see brothers from another place whom I have never met before and possibly will never meet again this side of heaven. It was nice to get out of our little box and see that we are not alone. We also had several people that we had given the John/Romans to that thanked us for caring for their city, mostly christians.

Lalo and me

Me with Pastor Julian, his son Joel, his wife Angelica, his daughter Carla and his son Gerson

in the church that sent him out

I worked with Manuel many days, he didn't speak English but we had a good time

     It was truly heart breaking to get on that plane and come home. I left with several memories that I will cherish for the rest of my life, things that will bring smiles to my soul now and again. I left with a heavier burden for the Mexican people and a deeper love for souls. I didn't want to leave but I just have to take everything in God's time. Maybe one day he will take me back over there and maybe not. Whatever he has for me I can say that, like this trip, I am sure that I will see great and mighty things which I know not.

Some things I've learned about clay

Sometimes the dried hard clay needs broken up and a little water added to it so that it will be usable again. Sometimes it needs to be kneaded because it has sat idle too long and needs to regain it's consistency. Some smashing may occur. Some forcing will occur. There will be a LOT of shaping. But most of all, the clay cannot be formed of itself, it needs the hands of a skilled potter.

I'm alive... I think... also quite a bit of reading (sorry)

Life has been great as of late. Nay, God has been great. A few things have happened in the past weeks where God has been breaking me down. In preaching for one and in other situations also. We are finishing up the book of Job in our church services just about to the end where God shows himself to Job and his greatness and infinite wisdom. Job confesses his vileness and God's supremacy and sheds his pride. It has been something that I have needed. God reminded me that I am vile and that I am just a sinner saved by grace. The breaking process can be painful but it is a great feeling to have a friend so close to console you, comfort you and sing you songs of deliverance.

The reason for the title is the fact that I could not find my birth certificate. Still have not and may never. I had to order a new one. But for what reason, you ask, do you need your birth certificate? For my passport. I am trying to get things rolling for my passport so that I can have it before the middle of May. I am planning on going with Bearing Precious Seed ministries to Ciudad Juarez, Mexico and I need a passport to go to Mexico. I found out about this trip from a newsletter from Chick Publications. I am very excited. Juarez Mexico is a mess, over 2 million people in one of the most dangerous places on earth. At least 8 people a day are reported killed. Drugs run rampant as well as gangs. But the real heart of the problem is sin. They are without God and without hope and through this campaign I hope that things will change. We, should God allow me to make it, will be passing out half a million Spanish John and Romans. After each of the five days we'll be there, there will be a message preached in a public place to the people of Juarez. It's going to be work, it's going to be different and, perhaps, in some cases, uncomfortable but it would be worth it to see even one soul saved. Pray for these people who are going, the hosting church, Valley Baptist in el Paso, TX and the people of Juarez. Please pray for me too because I can see that it is going to be a fight to get there, against the flesh and other circumstances.


I am pretty sure that I have needed something like this for a long time. I have seen my heart get hard toward missions and souls. I once had no greater desire than to be a missionary. That was my goal. But I allowed myself to get cold and let the world get a hold of me. I dabbled with this and that and there were periods of fervency and then frigidness making for an overall of lukewarm but my biggest problem was that I lost my vision. And without a vision the people perish. Lately God has been working on me and reminding me that there is an eternity where people will spend in one of two places and the majority will not be in heaven but in the darkness of hell. I have a certain friend who claims to be an atheist and it has been one of the millstones that has been breaking me down. I see the sadness that he lives with and his hoplessness. These things bother me and bring me to tears. But then I think about a whole world filled with people who have a lack of hope that there are people everywhere who need Christ. And others who have never heard about God or Jesus, ones who live in bondage trying desperately to please the spirits and gods of their culture, the gods and spirits who do not care for them but hate them, the ones that use and abuse people. I would that God would give me a courage and hope to reach more and more souls, to see liberty brought to the captives before his short return. Pray for me as I am but flesh and most likely will become distracted with this or that once again.


I guess I will fall on the grace of God. I will see what he does. I am excited because lately it seems I have started a new route in life, we'll see where God takes me. I have been falling in love with my saviour again, and with good reason. He's so lovely. He's so kind. He's a friend who loves with a holy love. His mercies are new every morning. He gives me peace and strength. He sings songs to my heart to lift me up. He is my all. I love him. I owe him all, for that is the only reasonable thing I can give.


Scripture to ponder:
Luke 14:26 If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.

27 And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple.
...
33 So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple.

What is your life?

What is the point of life? Are we aimlessly stumbling around to obtain a good job, a spouse, a nice home and a handful of kids? To have our little niche in the world where you go to church and have your happy little family? Where you go out day after day to your workplace to maintain your cozy little nook in the world? Or is there perhaps a higher calling? One where you are sent out to live a life of basics and sacrifice so that others can hear the gospel. A life where your little nook is constantly challenged. About whether or not you can live well, let alone comfortably. Where health is sometimes out of grasp. A life that is lived on your knees. This life is not lived for ourselves but first God and then others. It is a life lived this way so that the cause of Christ rings loudly and clearly. When others see this life lived they are taken back at the way God uses you and the grace he shows you. This life is that of a christian- he who gives all he has with all his might to obtain something that cannot be lost. This is the life that I want to live. Whether I have just a hammock in the jungle, an apartment in the city or a box on the street, I would that my all is given to Christ.

Determination or purpose.

I am heavy with several friends and comrades falling to the rush decision to get into a relationship or get married and last night I finally had enough when I recieved some bad news. Some of you might read this or I should say two of you(and you know who you are[and I'm praying for you btw]) and possibly think that it's directed at you, well it's not. I just want to show other kids my age and younger that you can do it the right way and that whenever/if ever I get married that I did it the right way. So here's my determination.


I am determined that should God have me get married that I will do all things in the process correctly. I will not be secretive and go behind people's back, especially my parents. I will not be a back stabber. I will not disrespect my parents', my close (and godly) friends', or my pastor's advice. I will not shun other friends in favor of spending all my time with whoever she is. I will make God the center of our relationship and only move at his impulse remembering that this vile flesh in which I live cannot be trusted. I will not get too attached before I know that she is or is not the one. I will let the Bible be the deciding factor im my marriage to her. I will marry for God's glory and his alone.